Date: 2000-09-15
Time: 02:53:16

fuck. I had a dream the other night that was so horrendously blatant in its meaning it almost hurts to think about. I'm going to write about it right now. I was originally planning on writing it in the format wherein the reader transcribes a discussion he or she has (theoretically) had with some friend or associate, where the content of the discussion is what the author wants to say in the first place, but that's so completely cheesy and self-serving that no I think I am just going to fucking talk about it.

ok so I was trying to get home, right? so I was trying to get on the L. I kept following all these signs that said "L" and had an arrow, from like Union Square, but I could never seem to find the train platform. just convoluted passage after convoluted passage. eventually they started leading me outside and all this shit. I could totally tell the "L" signs were taking me further and further away from New York but I followed them anyway. I was totally out in the woods after some time, walking along this path, and there were still "L" signs, the "L" tantalizingly rendered in Arial on that grey circle, on matte black, with an arrow urging me on. Finally I see trains, but lo, they're not "L" trains whatsoever, no, they're Boston Green Line trains. I was so far away I could see Green Line trains. I just wanted to get back to my apartment in Brooklyn and that's where I ended up. And I was looking at the Green Line trains, they were making their way through this woodsy area where the leaves were just beginning to fade into the fall spectrum particular to New England, and I thought to myself (in the dream): these trains will be going right past my old house, in Newton.

because, see, this is in fact the case. the Green Line "D" branch runs about a block and a half from my house. Not nearly as close as the JMZ does here, mind you no. The JMZ runs about 10 feet from my bedroom window on elevated tracks. The Green Line in Newton was never so close that it kept me up late with its rumbling and clacking and 60-hz high-voltage electrical hum.

Anyway the point is that upon thinking this thought about the trains and my old house in the dream, my dream-self became so completely overwhelmed with nostalgia that I wanted to like bawl. I swear to God if I'd felt that strongly while awake I would have been rendered momentarily unable to function. It was like that. that is in fact the wierd part, the whole reason I'm bothering to relate this to the internet in the first place, cuz like aside from fear I don't have much memory at all of emotional response in any of my dreams.

wait. that's not true. I once had a dream where the Vogons were about to destroy the Earth, so everyone had like five minutes to live, and so I ran outside and everyone was running around in mad panic but this beautiful girl came up to me and was like, we're about to die anyway, we should have sex, so we did, and that was fucking fantastic I must say. despite the imminent destruction of all humanity I still woke up from that one with that I-knew-it-was-too-good-to-be-true feeling. yeah.

yeah so I wish I had something fascinating to report but other than my fucked up dreams my 9 to 5 life is so completely mundane and pathetic that that's really it really. so yeah. blagh.