Date: 2001-12-24
Time: 5:06 a.m.

fuckin' a. I'm sick. I haven't updated in a while cuz Z's back and I can't just leave my computer plugged into the internet, and the sneaky length of fone wire I rigged from my room to the main interface is staticky and drops the connection so blagh. yeah. I'm sick as a dog. I have no fever but it sure as heckfire feels like someone rammed caulking guns into my nose, and then caulked it. it sucks moose balls I tell you. I took sudafed last night but since I learned that sudafed means pseudoephedrine which means 'vaguely structurally related to amphetamines' I get this nasty placebo effect where I know damn well I'm not on any amphetamines or anything like them but my lower brain functions don't buy it, so I just sat in a puddle of my own sweat, twisting around and dehydrated, until 4:00 AM when it wore off, at which point I stopped being dehydrated and went back to the whole caulking-gun-head thing, which was really just as effective a condition in terms of keeping me from sleeping whatsoever, so I spent this morning in some sort terrible semi-drugged fugue. also I have acid reflux from severely overeating while at my half-brother's wedding, which I just came back from. that sucks also.

so yeah merry fucking christmas, I hope santa claus breaks into your house and leaves lots of expensive toys from 'Best Buy' and other retail establishments under the tree you set up for him. I'm jewish so I don't get that shit, haha.

but but yes the cat is back. I love the cat. the cat rules. the cat is so easy to live with, unlike Z, with whom I had a seriously weighty shouting match last week just cuz she whimmed it so; she came into my room and just started yelling at like 9:30 after I'd been out drinking the night before and was starting to move from 'pre-sick' to just sick. I forgave her for this totally irrational intrusion, for which she apologized profusely later, but it was wack and anyway the cat never pulls this kind of shit.

I've been in the house all day reading and doodling ugly crap in my sketchbook with a detestable blue ballpoint pen I stole from the DMV, and trying to fix the ae comp for my live set coming up. yeah I didn't tell you, the disembodied diaryland patron, about this shit cuz I've been not on the internet, but here you go: I did live video at a club in bklyn not too long ago. jesse made hot music. I thought my shit was unbearably terrible, but apparently they liked it, cuz they want me to play this New Year's parteee, and I said I'd do it cuz I ain't got nuttin better to do, but so yeah. anyway yeah so today I tried to fix some theoretically hot 3D shit that looks just awful in practice. I'm probably screwed, cuz I did the first live set by composing lots of interesting things on my laptop and then using Z's desktop to do the grunt rendering work, and I ended up playing most of the video off of her portable firewire drive, a fact that would give her actual reason to yell at me if she knew, so anyway yeah now I have access to none of these things so it's going to be lame.

yeah but the cat's back and I love the cat, so fuck everything. yes.

I also love girls, as I've mentioned (with increasing frequency) here before. one of these days, girls will wise up, and love me right back, but until then it's me and the cat and my dippy animations and my unvanquishable supply of homemade pecan pie. ah well, c'est la vie.

anyway yeah. most likely there'll be no more posts till I settle in troy, but yeahyeah, I'll talk to you then, cuz I love you. it's that easy.